The relationship that I felt needed working on is between a friend and me. We have been friends since childhood but got separated once we were done with high school. We have occasionally tried to keep in touch using social media, but it has not been effective. She used to be my confidant and I hers. The memories shared bonded us together for more than a decade. I desired for the friendship to continue growing as opposed to the way in which we have become distanced. I committed myself to call her every day and catch up on her experiences in the town where she moved to. I also intended to make our interactions more about her to help in making her feel valued. While we were used to only texting each other once or twice a week, we ended up chatting for one and a half hours after I called for the first time.
I had a look back at our relationship and realized that she was the one working for the relationship while I was the taker. She was so concerned about my wellbeing, which explained why she was always the one texting first. Our goodbyes were tearful when she was moving to another town for higher education. I recalled the many times she defended me against bullying in high school while I expected her to be strong enough to fight for herself. I also discovered that not having her around had contributed to feelings of emptiness in college. We had a lot of catching up to do. When I asked about how she was doing, she opened up about the new town she moved to and the many friends she had made already. She further regaled me with details about her class and the various personalities of her classmates. After talking with her, I felt a pleasant sense of calmness that I had not felt in a long time.
On calling her the following day, she suggested that we should meet and plan on hanging out often. We planned to meet during the weekend and both of us were are excited about it. She has no idea what has prompted me to rekindle our friendship. We have been friends for so long and I could feel us grow apart because to the distance between us. I have learnt that communication is very important in maintaining relationships. This is because communication ensures that both parties are aware of the expectations of the other (Myers 150; Bok 139-155). It also helps in resolving conflicts or resentment that would fester if not addressed adequately.
My old friend and I are excited about our renewed friendship. Talking to her on the phone everyday has helped in keeping tabs on her academic and social life. She is so good at describing people that I feel as if I am a part of her class. She is also very impressed at my initiative in communicating with her. She has said that she has noticed that I have somehow matured. Although it stings, it feels good to hear that coming from her. She has also taken cue and calls me at times. We talk every night and continue to plan for the meet up. This activity has helped revive an important relationship that was in danger of dying.
Bok, Derek. The Politics Of Happiness. Princeton, N.J.: Princeton University Press, 2010. Print.
Myers, David G. The Pursuit Of Happiness. 1992. Print.